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Your Relationship with Your SELF - Are You Ready To Be a Better YOU?Hello Dear Friend My gift to you of beauty are the flowers on this page. Know that you are as beautiful- in mind, body and spirit. As you allow SPIRIT to move in and through your life, you too will bloom as beautiful as these flowers. Of course, all pictures are provided by "Saint" an award winning artist. Thanks Saint!
Self Help Yourself This beautiful article is almost poetic in telling this author's vision and dreams on the miracle of marriage. So much is true-especially about long term friendships and the power of being with someone who makes you LAUGH!
PARTNERS AND MARRIAGE by Eduardo Jose E. Calasanz I have never met a man who didn't want to be loved. But I have seldom met a man who didn't fear marriage. Something about the closure seems constricting, not enabling. Marriage seems easier to understand for what it cuts out of our lives than for what it makes possible within our lives. When I was younger this fear immobilized me. I did not want to make a mistake. I saw my friends get married for reasons of social acceptability, or sexual fever, or just because they thought it was the logical thing to do. Then I watched, as they and their partners became embittered and petty in their dealings with each other. I looked at older couples and saw, at best, mutual toleration of each other. I imagined a lifetime of loveless nights and bickering days and could not imagine subjecting myself or someone else to such a fate. And yet, on rare occasions, I would see old couples who somehow seemed to glow in each other's presence. They seemed really in love, not just dependent upon each other and tolerant of each other's foibles. It was an astounding sight, and it seemed impossible. How, I asked myself, can they have survived so many years of sameness, so much irritation at the others habits? What keeps love alive in them when most of us seem unable to even stay together, much less love each other? The central secret seems to be in choosing well. There is something to the claim of fundamental compatibility. Good people can create a bad relationship, even though they both dearly want the relationship to succeed. It is important to find someone with whom you can create a good relationship from the outset. Unfortunately, it is hard to see clearly in the early stages. Sexual hunger draws you to each other and colors the way you see yourselves together. It blinds you to the thousands of little things by which relationships eventually survive or fail. You need to find a way to see beyond this initial overwhelming sexual fascination. Some people choose to involve themselves sexually and ride out the most heated period of sexual attraction in order to see what is on the other side. This can work, but it can also leave a trail of wounded hearts. Others deny the sexual side altogether in an attempt to get to know each other apart from their sexuality. But they cannot see clearly, because the presence of unfulfilled sexual desire looms so large that it keeps them from having any normal perception of what life would be like together. The truly lucky people are the ones who manage to become long-time friends before they realize they are attracted to each other. They get to know each other's laughs, passions, sadness, and fears. They see each other at their worst and at their best. They share time together before they get swept up into the entangling intimacy of their sexuality. This is the ideal, but not often possible. If you fall
under the spell of your sexual attraction immediately, you need
to look beyond it for other keys to compatibility. One of these
is laughter. Laughter tells you how much you will enjoy each
others company over the long term. If your laughter together is
good and healthy, and not at the expense of others, then you
have a healthy relationship to the world. Laughter is the child of surprise. If you can make each other Beware of a relationship in which there is no laughter. Even the most intimate relationships based only on seriousness have a tendency to turn sour. Over time, sharing a common serious
viewpoint on the world tends to turn you against After laughter, look for a partner who deals with the world in a way you respect. When two people first get together, they tend to see their relationship as existing only in the space between the two of them. They find each other endlessly fascinating, and the overwhelming power of the emotions they are sharing obscures the outside world. As the relationship ages and grows, the outside world becomes important again. If your partner treats people or circumstances in a Look at the way she cares for others and deals with Look also at how your partner confronts the mysteries of life. There are many other keys, but you must find them by yourself. We all have unchangeable parts of our hearts that we will not betray and private commitments to a vision of life that we will not deny. If you fall in love with someone who cannot nourish those inviolable parts of you, or if you cannot nourish them in her, you will find yourselves growing further apart until you live in separate worlds where you share the business of life, but never touch each other where the heart and dreams live. From there it is only a small leap to the cataloging of petty hurts and daily failures that leaves so many couples bitter and unsatisfied with their mates. So choose carefully and well. If you do, you will have chosen a partner with whom you can grow, and then the real miracle of marriage can take place in your hearts. I pick my words carefully when I speak of a miracle. But I think it is not too strong a word. There is a miracle in marriage. It is called transformation. Transformation is one of the most common events of nature. The seed becomes the flower. The cocoon becomes the butterfly. Winter becomes spring and love becomes a child. We never question these, because we see them around us every day. To us they are not miracles, though if we did not know them they would be impossible to believe. Marriage is a transformation we choose to make. Our love is planted like a seed, and in time it begins to flower. We cannot know the flower that will blossom, but we can be sure that a bloom will come. If you have chosen carefully and wisely, the bloom will be good. If you have chosen poorly or for the wrong reason, the bloom will be flawed. We are quite willing to accept the reality of negative transformation in a marriage. It was negative transformation that always had me terrified of the bitter marriages that I feared when I was younger. It never occurred to me to question the dark miracle that transformed love into harshness and bitterness. Yet I was unable to accept the possibility that the first heat of love could be transformed into something positive that was actually deeper and more meaningful than the heat of fresh passion. All I could believe in was the power of this passion and the fear that when it cooled I would be left with something lesser and bitter. But there is positive transformation as well. Like negative transformation, it results from a slow accretion of little things. But instead of death by a thousand blows, it is growth by a thousand touches of love. Two histories intermingle. Two separate beings, two separate presences, two separate consciousness come together and share a view of life that passes before them. They remain separate, but they also become one. There is an expansion of awareness, not a closure and a constriction, as I had once feared. This is not to say that there is not tension and there are not traps. Tension and traps are part of every choice of life, from celibate to monogamous to having multiple lovers. Each choice contains within it the lingering doubt that the road not taken was somehow more fruitful and exciting, and each becomes dulled to the richness that it alone contains. But only marriage allows life to deepen and expand and be leavened by the knowledge that two have chosen, against all odds, to become one. Those who live together without marriage can know the pleasure of shared company, but there is a specific gravity in the marriage commitment that deepens that experience into something richer and more complex. So do not fear marriage, just as you should not rush into it for the wrong reasons. It is an act of faith and it contains within it the power of transformation. If you believe in your heart that you have found someone with whom you are able to grow, if you have sufficient faith that you can resist the endless attraction of the road not taken and the partner not chosen, if you have the strength of heart to embrace the cycles and seasons that your love will experience, then you may be ready to seek the miracle that marriage offers. If not, then wait. The easy grace of a marriage well made is worth your patience. When the time comes, a thousand flowers will bloom...endlessly.
____________________________________________________________________________________________ Your relationship with I started these new business ventures in part because I am really happy being married (most days). I also want to assist other people who are looking to be in committed relationships to at least find someone compatible they can be with. Most of what I have been taught leads back to YOU. It then follows that if you are the one who determines the quality of your relationship, by sharing what I know to be "truths" it should be easier to stop choosing people that will cause you unnecessary grief. All the tools I have at my disposal I will happily pass along. Should there be anything you think I can assist with please let me know. Pampering yourself is a great way to boost your self esteem. When you think well of yourself, it is difficult to allow anyone to mistreat you. Pampering YOU should be a priority, not a luxury. To support you - in addition to our dating events we will also offer pamper sessions. Please go to the following page if this is of interest to you.
Pamper Yourself with Warm Spirit! Gratitude - A (K)New way to get into YOU!
To receive more, you MUST FIRST be grateful for what you HAVE- Right here and RIGHT NOW! Questions- just ASK!
There are books that can guide you along the way. Many are books that you have heard of, some may be more obscure. All point to the fact that in addition to having faith in the God of your choice, you MUST also have faith in yourself and the messages you are given(small voice within). Very few times do things happen out of the blue. We ALWAYS get a warning when something is coming. The most difficult lesson is in learning to LISTEN! Weekly E-Meditation by Vic Johnson I will include the James Allen eMeditations as they pertain to relationships, with ourselves AND with others. Vic Johnson has done an incredible job of taking this timeless classic to the next level. I will forward a free copy to anyone who requests this e-book. Please use the "contact me" form for your request. Enjoy the reading.
James Allen eMeditation - April 30, 2007 This week's eMeditation: To put it another way: When you stop working on what it is you're trying to get, and start working on YOU, only then will you get what it is you want. It really is very basic when you think about it. Jim Rohn says, "To attract attractive people, you must be attractive. To attract powerful people, you must be powerful. To attract committed people, you must be committed. Instead of going to work on them, you go to work on yourself. If you become, you can attract." I know so many people who work very hard and diligently and sacrifice greatly in an effort to create wealth. But they haven't changed who they are, and until they begin to think and act like wealthy people they'll never attract the wealth they seek. Wealthy people don't think and act the way they do because they have wealth. They have wealth because they think and act that way. How many people are on a diet today who don't stand a chance of losing (and keeping off) any weight because they're still the same person who gained all that weight to start with. Let me repeat again, so you'll grasp how important this is: Slimpeople don't think and act the way they do because they're slim. They're slim because they think and act that way. To get what you want, you change who you are, and you change who you are by simply changing the way you think and act. And one technique for doing that which is promoted by a lot of wise teachers is to "act as if." If you "act as if" you're slim long enough, then one day you will attract slimness even though you may be 100 pounds overweight today. If you act as if you're wealthy long enough, then one day you will attract all the wealth you can imagine even though you may this moment be destitute and homeless. Bob Proctor says, "Act like the person you want to become. For as Goethe, the German philosopher, once wrote, 'Before you can do something, you first must be something.'" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank You Have an awesome week! Vic Johnson Could we send you another f-r-e-e eBook Classic? Do you know someone who would benefit from the wisdom of "As A Man Thinketh?" Why not let them know about our website and our f-r-e-e eBook? As our thanks for your referral we'll send you Russell Conwell's all-time best seller, "Acres of Diamonds", also in eBook format. Go to: http://AsAManThinketh.net/referral.htm And thanks for supporting AsAManThinketh.net -- vic _______________________________ ________________________________ The contents of this E-zine may be copied, reproduced, or freely distributed for all nonprofit purposes without the consent of the author as long as the author's name, copyright notice and contact information are included. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------AsAManThinketh.net
I thought these MountainWings so appropriate-enjoy the readings and the message. ------------------------------------------------- MountainWings A MountainWings Moment Woman Seeking Man We get many prayer requests for a mate.Many are lonely and seek a spouse. We get many more prayer requests from those who need help in dealing with the spouse that they already have. This issue may help many women (and men) who are desperately looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right. Some have even settled for Mr. or Mrs. Right Now. Society and perhaps biology have long ago programmed women to believe that they need to be married early. Good marriage is a good thing, make no mistake about that, but so many rush headlong into misery. Let me give those rushing and anxious souls something to consider that may make the wait far more tolerable. 1. Over half of all marriages end in divorce. Divorce is rated as the second most traumatic event in life, second only to death of a spouse. By the time people divorce, they have usually gone through many years of unhappiness. 2. I read a survey in USA Today years ago that has always stuck with me. The question was: "If you could get married all over again,would you marry the same person?" The results surprised me. 50% said yes, but 50% said no. Half of the couples married for over 25 years said they would NOT marry that person again. I know from dealing with people that those stats are accurate. So here is the breakdown. According to the stats, if you marry, there is a one in five chance that you will be together 25 years later and not regretwhom you married. One in five! Marriage is a great thing when it is right. When it is very wrong, you are far better off remaining single. I did not marry until I was 38 years old. Take your time. There is one other bit of advice. Listen to mama and daddy. It may save you many headaches and heartaches from what you are rushing off to do. ~A MountainWings Original~ Thank you for inviting MountainWings in your mailbox. *****************************************************************Visit www.TheOnLineWord.com for AUDIO messages for YOUR LIFE Subject: MountainWings:Tuesday - The Next Bus Date: Tue, 06 Apr 2004 00:00:00 -0500 You know, love is just like someone waiting for a bus.When the bus comes, you look at it and you say to yourself "eeee...so full...cannot sit down, I'll wait for the next one." So you let that bus go and wait for the second bus. Then the second bus comes, you look at it and you say, "eeee...this bus is so old...so shabby!" So you let that bus go and again, decide to wait for the next bus. After a while another bus comes, it's not crowded, not old but you say, "eeee... not air-conditioned ...better wait for the next one." So again you let the bus go and decide to wait for the next bus. Then the sky starts to get dark as it is getting late. You panic and jump immediately inside the next bus. It is not until much later that you found out that you had boarded the wrong bus! So you wasted your time and money waiting for what you wanted! Even if an air-conditioned bus comes, you can't ensure that the air-conditioned bus won't break down or whether or not the air conditioner will be too cold for you. So people... wanting to get what you want is not wrong. But it wouldn't hurt to give other people a chance, right? If you find that the "bus" doesn't suit you, just press the red button and get off the bus (as simple as that). Hey who said life is fair??? The best thing to do is beobservant and open while you scrutinize the bus. If it doesn't suit you, get off. But you must always have an extra something which you could use for the next bus that comes. But wait... I'm sure you've had this experience before.You saw a bus coming (the bus you want, of course), you flagged it but the driver acted as if he did not see you and zoomed past you! It just wasn't meant for you! The bottom line is, being loved is like waiting for a bus you want. Getting on the bus and appreciating the bus by giving it a chance depends totally on you. If you haven't made a choice, WALK! Walking is like being out of love. The good side of it is you can still choose any bus you want... the rest who couldn'tafford another ride would just have to be content with the bus they rode on. One more thing.... sometimes it's better to choose a bus you are already familiar with rather than gamble with a bus that is unfamiliar to you. But then again, life wouldn't be complete without the risks involved. But there's one bus that I forgot to tell you about - the bus that you don't have to wait for. It will just stop on its own and will ask you to come inside and take a free ride for the rest of your life. You Never Lose By LovingYou Always Lose By Holding Back ~Author Unknown~ Thank you for inviting MountainWings in your mailbox.See you tomorrow. ************************************************************ BOOK LIST The Bible As a Man Thinketh - To receive a FREE copy of the Ebook "As A Man Thinketh" click here to request by email. Classic for altering the way you look at the world. Highly recommend to read at least once. ThinK and Grow Rich Though not specific to relationships, it will enrich all facets of your life. Don't let the title fool you. Acts of Faith -Daily Meditations for People of Color - This too will be a timeless classic. If you have it, please use it. If you don't have it I would highly recommend it. Though it is set up in a daily/yearly format, I used mine for almost 7 years (seven long years) DAILY before I moved on to something else. As you grow spiritually and emotionally you will get deeper levels in the daily meditations. This book is a life saver! Any Daily book of Prayer/Meditation - These daily readings allow you to connect to God and become more focused and centered before greeting the world each day. Stress will be more managable, you will be calmer and more relaxed. The Upper Room The Prayer for Protection has been around for as long as I remember.
James Dillet Freeman's "Prayer for Protection" courtesy of Unity Online Mountain Wings- Daily Motivation Delivered to your email!
I found a wonderful resource for those of you looking for articles (galore) and FREE tips on how to improve every aspect of your life. Spend some quality time with yourself at
Personal Self Help Resources.
Time invested into yourself is NEVER wasted.Enjoy and treasure this special period in your life.
The Prophet - Beautifully poetic little book that addresses everyday life. Most of you do know this, but time is often considered a factor in not doing the little things for yourself that are so important. You never know when you are going to meet that fabulous man or woman and it would be great if you were smiling and relaxed when that divine meeting occurs. Take the time. Be Blessed. Michelle
Books for building a better relationship with yourself can be found at Amazon.com!
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